Friday, July 5, 2013

Thing #84: Host a dinner party

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There are times in all of our lives when we have to make dinner for our friends.  There is no point trying to avoid it, your turn will come.  Dinner has been made for you seventeen times now and you haven’t volunteered to do it once.  Not once.  People are starting to talk.  There are no more excuses.

If the thought of hosting a dinner party causes your heart to start beating like a dryer with shoes in it, I understand.  I’ve felt the fear and done it anyway, and when I did I realised there was nothing to be afraid of after all.

There is nothing scary about The Dinner Party.  We’ve already established that you will eventually have to feed your friends at some point – it’s just good manners.   The Dinner Party is merely a way of feeding your friends in a predictable environment.  The last thing you want is to find yourself staring into your kitchen cupboard during an unplanned feeding crisis, wondering how you can make two tins of beans and an old potato look like dinner?  (Real life).  The Dinner Party allows you to plan, to buy fresh ingredients, to arrange some soft lighting and put together a chilled-out playlist.  The Dinner Party is indeed a grown-up affair, but it’s nowhere near as stuffy or pretentious as you thought.

Still afraid?  I have some tips.

Don’t do it by yourself.  Co-hosting is easier than hosting.  A three-course meal is daunting for anyone to undertake alone; taking charge of one course is much more doable.  Baby steps.

Have everything ready.  Only cook things that can be prepared (and ideally completely finished) ahead of time.  When your guests arrive, you will want to spend time with them.  Things to avoid:  steaks cooked to order, recipes with the word flambé anywhere in them, risotto,  roast dinners or anything with lots of ‘sides’, béarnaise sauce or homemade custards, anything that needs last-minute ‘assembly work’, soufflés or anything else that will require your attention when you should be refilling everyone’s drinks.

Stick to what you know.  At a dinner party a couple of months ago, I served Spaghetti Bolognaise as the main dish.  There is nothing sophisticated or showy about Spaghetti Bolognaise but I’ve been making that dish (dare I say well?) since I was fifteen.  Everyone seemed to enjoy it and all the plates were cleared.  Success.  Do you watch Come Dine With Me? (My Mam is obsessed).  It always baffles me how often the contestants attempt a recipe for the first time on the show.  That’s just taking a bath with a toaster.  There is nothing wrong with easy and simple, if it tastes good.

Eat later than usual.  I’m slightly hesitant to reveal this one but… giving your guests a little time to work up an appetite will make whatever you serve taste better – so make them wait.  Leaving some time between the main course and dessert has the same effect.  My secret’s out.

It’s not all about the food.  I mean it’s not really about food at all, is it?  It’s about spending quality time with friends.  Of course.  You knew that.  My friends and I started this little tradition recently.  Every time we sit down to eat together, before we dig in, everyone shares one thing they are grateful for and (just for fun) one thing they are not grateful for.  It’s a nice way to start the dinner conversation.

Make it special.  Clean up, tidy up, dress up.  Light a few candles. Heck, string some bunting.  Buy the good wine.  People will notice.

€5 has been donated to UNICEF Ireland for the completion of this ‘thing’.  Click here if you too would like to donate online.

13 comments:

Elle Sees said...

wonderful tips! when i first started blogging, i shared my monthly parties on there. i miss them!

EMA said...

I love hosting dinner for friends! Especially decorating the table :) I think its the details that can make it special :)

This is great advice!

XX

www.themirroronthewall.com

daniela kate morosini said...

i've heard good things about vita liberata! i also hear it's like crazy expensive? oh well, for a good tan...

these are great tips - i always the starter and dessert prepared waaay before hand, or like literally needing to be put on a plate. but my family are italian are pretty relaxed about these things xx

Erica said...

Thanks for the tips. I'm not normally a big entertainer, but I have family coming to visit soon and will need to turn into a hostess! :)

Unknown said...

good tips.. I'm not the most spirited dinner party host either.. I'm usually the one trying to avoid people from coming to my house 'cause it's my alone and safe space ha.. I'm kind of a hermit honestly I love my loneliness and when I'm ready to see people I'll step out of the house, if not.. please don't knock.. is that mean?... I just like silence and quiet... although I've invited friends over for drinks and stuff but so much as a dinner party.. I think I'd have to buy all the food or get take out 'cause me and the kitchen.. don't go well haha.. reminds me of Carrie Bradshaw when she says she wouldn't know how to cook something 'cause "she keeps sweaters on her stove" haha same here...
fun weekend!

k said...

i hate giving dinner parties, seriously. too much work. but its definitely expected....oh life.

Unknown said...

Great post T! I love dinner parties, both hosting and being hosted :)

Gloria said...

"Stick to what you know" is a great tip! I hate stressing over a dinner party because I have NO idea how a certain dish will turn out

Camila Faria said...

These are amazing tips! Hosting a dinner party can be a little nerve-wracking for sure. I love your "eat later" suggestion.

Thelma Frayne said...

I miss them too Elle, you should rekindle that tradition.

@EMA, setting the table is my favourite part!

Erica, I don't believe that... with your DIY skills. I'm sure you should be the one telling me.

Unknown said...

Hey Thelma! These are some really good tips. I agree with you. I'm not a fan of hosting dinners or parties but it has to be done. I start cooking hours and hours before guests arrive, so that I'm not running around like a chicken later on. It's harder in Italy to have a relaxing dinner because the culture here is to eat course, after course, after course, so a couple dishes don't suffice. I literally have about 5 different dishes and fruit, dessert, and liquers available after the meal.

Wishing you a lovely day sweetie!
xo

Courtney said...

love your tips and I agree! I'm obsessed with dinner parties and plan a lot of them && post them on my blog, check them out here!

Xo Courtney Q || ColorMeCourtney.com

Unknown said...

This is a wonderful share on how to host a dinner party. Indeed it was quite useful post for me as we will soon be celebrating our first wedding anniversary so want to host a fun family party. We would prefer booking a rental convention center in LA for this bash. Hoping to find a right location soon.