I’ve been feeling weary of my impending 26th birthday. I feel so close to a number, but so far away from any expectations I had for my life at this point.
I’ll be 26. (26!)
I sometimes eat doughnuts for breakfast and have long considered Coco Pops as a viable dinner option. I get cranky if I haven’t had enough sleep. I carry vodka in my handbag on nights out. The thoughts of settling down somewhere (even that expression- eeeeeeeww!) gives me heart palpitations. I bite my nails and forget to take my vitamins and don’t pay my bills on time. I drink too much and wonder why I feel bad in the morning. I stamp my foot when I don’t get my own way. I steal pens and shot glasses from almost anywhere I can find them. I don’t know what a tracker mortgage is. When someone (my own age) tells me they’re pregnant, my instinctive reaction is to give them my ‘Oh my God, have you told your parents? look, rather than to congratulate them. I don’t know how to act at funerals.
I have no real commitments in my uncomplicated life, but sometimes I still struggle to get my two shoes on the right feet and get out the door on time in the mornings.
I don’t have any of the answers… (help!)